It's easy to look at a crying toddler and tell them, "It is NOT the end of the world that you will never get to meet Phinneas, Ferb, or Perry. Now shut up, and eat your peas." It's easy, because you know with all your heart and soul that Phinneas, Ferb, and Perry are just fictional characters that don't really exist in our world, and to you, they just add to the list of fictional people that you love to watch or read about, and peas are good for you.
But to that toddler? Phinneas and Ferb are the coolest kids he knows. They build the COOLEST crap, and their sister is too dumb to catch them at it. AND they have a pet platypus that doubles as a secret agent. Can you GET any more awesome? To that toddler, the only thing stopping him from meeting the two coolest boys on earth is a car ride, and you. Also, peas are disgusting. So bring on the tears.
It's easy for us to shake our head and say "he'll get over it." And he will. But in that moment, that toddler is absolutely devastated. In that moment, the problem of Phinneas and Ferb's lack of existence is very real, and very psychologically upsetting to that child. Can't you remember being a child, and being so absolutely furious and upset about something that was... well... childish? And the fact that your parents dismissed how upset you were just made you madder. That problem was very real to you at the time.
I've heard people say things like, "Oh, your boss is a douchebag to you every single day of your life? The starving kids in Africa probably feel really sorry for you." Although there ARE starving children in Africa, being forced to earn money for hours upon hours every week under a boss that treats his minion like crap and lowers their self esteem is a very real personal problem to that person.
"Your boyfriend cheated on you? My soulmate of 29 years died of smoke inhalation after saving a litter of puppies, and the President from a burning building." Granted, that second scenario probably did have lasting psychological effects on that second woman. But in that moment, the ache of betrayal was a very real personal problem to girl number one.
"You have a stomach flu and a test coming up? I'm pregnant at 14." "You can't find a job? Animals are being brutally tested on." "You were molested as a child? The economy is crashing." "You're puppy won't stop peeing on everything? I kept losing at level 26 on Nazi Zombies."
The whole point I'm trying to make here, is that nobody's problems are insignificant.We all have different problems. Some of us have fewer problems than others. Some of us have more severe problems than others. But at one time or another, all of our problems are very very real to every single one of us. And we all need to be more sensitive to that.
You might think that thirteen-year-old girl is silly for being so upset about the boy who won't pay attention to her ("She'll barely remember him in ten years."), but in that moment, his opinion of her matters more than absolutely anyone else's, and there isn't much you can say to change that.
We all have problems.
And they are all very real and personal to us.
And nobody should tell you that your worries, your bad day, or your awful situation is trivial.
(I'm not saying you need to whine all the time.
And I'm not saying that everyone wants to/needs to/has a moral obligation to hear about your problems.
And if people don't hang around you because you're whiney all the time, I won't say they're not justified.
There's a line in telling your friends your problems, and being whiney to everyone around you. Learn it.
I'm saying that nobody has the right to tell you that your problems are trivial.)
